Bali Trip

I made a trip to Bali. It was a kind of adventure because I did not plan ahead to get tickets and hotel. Anyway, I went there. I arrived on 26 and come back on 29 December. I was late for the check in and when I reached the counter, nobody was there. I was so lucky to be able to make the trip.

Iris arranged for me to see temples. It was good and I appreciate her for giving time for me. Only thing was I need my own time to relax.

Christmas time in Manila

It was very nice to be in Manila during Christmas time. The malls, buildings and houses are lighted up. Christmas trees are everywhere. Philippinos I think are very polite and friendly. I wish I had more time to stay there.

Sometimes, I think I do not deserve God blessing. However, it is obvious God still loves me and protecting from danger even when I am in completely with devil. How many times? I started losing on counting since it has been many times. It will be definitely more than I remember. I was in horrible situation yesterday because I did stupid mistake out of curiosity. I could have lost everything at that moment and I was very vulnerable and completely in lost of control over things. I got humiliation and embarrassment that I deserve but God finally took me out to safe place.
I think God has been giving me warnings several times, once on the bridge, once near the hospital, once inside the hospital, once in the hotel, now near the market. I think I really need to change. God please help me.

Frist Consultancy Assignment

Went back home to my first assignment. $300 per day plus over $100 per diem per day is very attactive. I remember, when I started the business, my salary was less than $250 per month. It is also a day to remember 21 October, 2008.

More time for others

I pity myself for being under pressure at work. I will say no to other extra social works because I feel like I have enough stress.

We had long holiday for Hari Raya. But for me, there are many things to be worried as usual. But people from Church requsted me to help in a retreat for migrant workers. I did not have a heart to say no but I was so lazy to go. It was two days. Finally I did it. I thought I should go and find God since He said when two or three people gather in my name, I will be there..

I would say it was a great expereince. My heart that got harder in these days was treated by God. Not to be too selfish and self center but to look at other people. Don't forget to help my fellows. I did not think I have learnt all the things, I know all and such retreat will be just a waste of time for me. But I went there to help other but I was also blessed in many ways.

Chasity Belt

Look again, What is this? It is a chasity belt from 16 century which I found in a museum in Amsterdam. Women put on these things so that they cannot have sex. I think in the old days, men forced them to wear such things to make sure women could not have sex. But it is interesting..people are using them in morden days and they come for both men and women. I just learnt from internet.

What the hell?

Look at it? Guess what? Telephone boot? No it is a place for men to urinate. It stands proudly at the down town of Amsterdam..

I have two issues. It is not very hygenic and it is very gender insensitive. They should have places for women as well. Well they do not say it is just for men, I guess women can also use it if they are desperate. I did not know a big city in a developed nation still uses it as an option. Of course, I had to make sure I used it while I was in Amsterdam.

attachment

I called my niece. She came and talked. I asked where did she go today? She said she went with her father to send her brother to school. She would miss sending her cousin brother to school in Myanmar. I asked whether she played the toy I bought for her in Bangkok, she said she would play when she get back to Yangon. Her voice was soft and shaking. I knew she was sad. Then said she missed me and her aunty. Then she cried loudly. She could not control anymore. I just felt so sad for that five years old girl. She repeated again and again she missed her aunty who took care her like a mother for five years. It is a hard time for her.

I remember she was a very happy kid. She would jump and jump and shout if she is happy. She would play like a boy. Now in new environment eventhough with her own parents, she would feel like a stranger. I feel so sad.

She is leaving

Pwint May Thu is leaving today to Bangkok. Last night was her last night at our home. She did not know that she is going to settle there. She just thought she was visiting. So she was very happy and excited. I could even hear her laughters when I made a phone call to my mother to say don't be sorry too much. I pray she has a beautiful life there.

St. Fransic Peace Prayer

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;where there is hatred, let me sow love;when there is injury, pardon;where there is doubt, faith;where there is despair, hope;where there is darkness, light;and where there is sadness, joy.Grant that I may not so much seekto be consoled as to console;to be understood, as to understand,to be loved as to love;for it is in giving that we receive,it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,and it is in dying [to ourselves] that we are born to eternal life.

My Niece

Attachment! what does it mean? My sister left her baby with us because she and her husband in foreign country cannot take care of two children. We take care her like our own daughter and she is now five year old. It is time for her to go with her parents and study there..She is going. We all will be missing her. I just wish she will be happy there. I am worried she will be bored there because she is quiet used to living with a lot of people around her. She might also be missing us. I know, I should not be sad. But I will be sad to see her leave.. She is leaving us on 12 August. Only four days left.

She has her own brother there. Will that boy love her as her cousin brother loves her? They stay like real brother and sister and I just hope she can happily settle there without missing too much her cousin brother and sister.

Me Me, we all will be missing you.

It is not really a quote but a short story. It was written by a Catholic Priest as a poem. I forgot his name and I forgot the name of the book. It is the problem with me. I read book, I meet people and forget the names. But not the contents. I also do not forget who shared me this book. It was Iris, my good Indonesian friend. She gave me this book when I was very sad for my father health.. The story name is "The Guru and the cat".

Once upon a time, there was a Guru. He had a cat. That cat disturbed him by rubbing his legs with its body whenever he meditated. So he asked his disciples to tie it up when he meditated. So it became a duty for his disciples to tie the cat whenenver the Guru meditated. Many years passed, the Guru died. A new Guru came in. The disciples continue tieing the cat when the new Guru meditated. Many years passed. The cat died, new cat came in. They continue the practice and tie the new cat when the Guru meditated. The new Guru died, another Guru came in. They continue the practice. Many years passed, many Gurus died, many cats died... The disciples there still practicing it and cats are tied at the time Guru meditates....

Yes, we do tie cat sometimes. Don't we?

passing a pleasant evening innocently

I remember fighting each other for nothing when we were high school students. Now we have passed how many years?? Oh my God, I don't want to count the number. Some of my friends are now very rich business men, some are successful doctors, some are great engineers.

I got chance to pass a pleasant evening with two old friends in Singapore. We have dinner, we talked about our old days, we made jokes and laugh each others...Now I more and more realize the value of good friends.

taman saga hill

I had diarrhea and tired But my colleages like to do jungle tracking up to taman saga hill. It was my first time of doing such thing in my life. Where can we do it in my home town? It will be a good memory about Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia..

A big seat

Well, people like to get a seat. The more greedy, the bigger seat they want. After having a seat, they will never let it go...

I saw a big seat with a broken leg in front of the United Nations Office in Geneva. Maybe, it is sending message to all, that don't be too crazy about big positions. They might not have all four legs..

Where are my photos?

I took a lot of pictures when I was in Geneva. I saved the file on my computer. Next day, I asked IT guy to reformat my computer. Then I found I lost my photo folder. Needless to say, I feel sorry for that. We tried to find them back but the attempts were not successful.

Finally, I said myself.. relax you own nothing. God can take back anything what you think are yours..So Do I need think about these photos? I still have some of them and should be happy with them.

transgender

There are always new things for you to learn. I thought I knew pretty much about transgender since I am a medical person and working in HIV/AIDS field. But I found out a new fact about transgender last week.

Every body knows transgenders are the males who dress up like women or females who dress up like men. We always see man to woman transgender everywhere with their big boots. I always think that they will to like to have sex with men as they act and dress like women. But I saw a video clip recently where a she male is having sex using his/her penis. I have never thought that their tools can function in such way. Well..we cannot underestimate anyone..

Surprise

Well, it is not to be surprised that we have many surprises in our lives. Some are nice surprise and some are not very nice.

I had a nice surprise when I was in Geneva last week. I was there from 30 June to 6 July for a meeting. We used public transportation there which is free and very efficient. Every morning, we wait at the bus stop to get on the bus which comes on the exact time. There I met with my old freind Mari Nagari on 2 July. She is from Japan and we met where we studied together at Hopkins. We stayed at the same apartment and took same cources. It was such a big nice surprise to see her since I stay in Malaysia and she stays in Japan and it was in Geneva.

We had a free day on Saturday so we went sight seeing together to France. It was a nice day. We also was able to ask each other to take our photos with nice views. Hmm it is also a good thing about having good friends. I posted in front of the beautiful view of Alps mountain in France. We can see it's snowing there.

The difference

I was in Swissland for a week. I went to the Geneva park and saw a group of children playing happily together in a beautiful water fountain. I feel happy watching them. I am pleased to see a while girl was playing with a black boy. They have very enjoyable childhood. Every child should have such a peaceful and enjoyable life..

I standed there for a while to watch them playing happily. Then my mind went back to my own country. I felt very sorry for children in my country. Many of them cannot enjoy their innocent childhood. I know we do not need a nice park, beautiful water fountain and expensive clothes to make them happy. Children can be happy when they have enough food and freedom to play without any worry. But many children in my country do not even have such basic needs.

I asked God to give me wisdom to undestand why He created people so differently....

moved to a new place

23 May, Friday, I moved to a new place which is bigger and better. I miss my old cozy place though. I thought I did not have many things to move but found out there were quiet a lot. D 1.3 is now my new paradise.

I had a group of visitor on the first night, I moved to my new place. Three Burmese and one Japanese. I am expecting more visitors. Welcome to my pardise...

Cannel e

I am not a fan of TV but when I travel, I watch TV to know a bit of local culture. Well, during my last trip to South Africa, I found interesting channel. It was channel e. I was on jet lag so I switched on the TV around midnight and flipped the lines. Then what I saw on cannel e made me even awake. A movie with a lot of love scenes was on the air. It fished in few minutes then another movie was on the air. It was about fantasy of a woman and again with a lot of explicit love scenes. Wow, I should have known it before because it was my last night in South Africa.
Then I fall sleep without switching off the TV and when I woke up in the morning, the channel was showing a program called “ higher life” with a lot of gospel songs. All I could here was Alleluia Alleluia Alleluia. It was very strange for me. Last night, it was the cannel with a lot of sexy things and porn advertisements and in the morning it was in very different mood. I was laughing myself. I thought it was like some people who have split personalities. Then after a while, something in myself told me ‘hey why it was so strange? You are also like that..I have to agree.. Yes, I am also just like channel e. I did not know that. Oh no. I knew that..

South Africa Again

Africa is so far from my home. I went to South Africa last year and I need to travel again for a workshop from 9 to 11 April. The workshop finished on Friday but my flight to go back home is only on Sunday. I don't know how they arranged anyway, I got the whole Saturday to visit around.
I have seen most of the city. The hotel " Birchwood" where I am staying now is in the middle of no where. It is so expensive to go other places so I just visited the shopping malls around my hotel.
It is actually quite boring. I like to explore the city but it is not safe. So I just went around the big hotel compound and took the picture of that strange tree. God has created all sorts of things for us.

A day to be remember

It was not really a strange thing. But I am not going to forget the day. 6 April, 2008. Today, I did some crazy thing for the first time.
The day on which I started sitting, I could not rember. The day when I start standing, I could remember. I day when I start schooling, remember but could not tell exactly when. The day on which I start doing what every boy would do, could remember but cannot tell exactly. The day I gave the first kiss on my girl first friend's cheeck, could remember and exact date in my old diary. There are many days. Anyway, those were the days.

My Mother's Birthday

Today is my mother’s birthday. She is the most amazing woman I have seen in this world. Her life is simple. She was born in a little village in delta area. She is the eldest of seven brothers and sisters. She did not get chance to go to school when she was young because of the war and ethnic conflicts in her area. She married with my father moved to Yangon, the capital of Myanmar, raised nine kids as a house wife and it is her simple life.

She is not an educated but she could raise highly educated children. She is just a house wife who seldom leaves the house but she did her job very well. She used to say, oh I am working from morning to night in this house. I am not paid. I don’t know what keep me that busy in the house.

Needless to say, it was very difficult for our parents to raise and educate nine kids. All, nine of us are now university graduates and we have a vet, a dentist, two doctors and one engineer among us. My father was the only one breadwinner as we all went school and part time work in our country was usually not an option at that time.

My mother could not earn any money to contribute our study cost but she managed our father limited income very well so that every one of us got proper education without needing to work.

How did my mother manage? She is very good at sewing. She would try any design and any cutting for both boys and girls. A piece of clothe that will give you only a shirt if you go to tailors will produce a shirt for the elder son and a small shirt for the younger one. She can make beautiful blouses and shirts out of extra pieces of clothe. Although our father’s income was limited, all of us had decent clothes though out the year. I still remember our friends admired our new shirts at Christmas and New Year timed and asked where we made them.

She is also a good cook. She would try to cook all sorts of food. India cuisine, Chinese cuisine or you name it. She won’t spend money to buy food from restaurants. In that way, we had good food of larger amount in cheaper rate.

My mother was illiterate because she did not get chance to go school when she was young. But later she learnt how to read and write herself. She learnt together with her nine kids as we went to primary schools.

I still remember one of the events when I was seven and in the second standard. I was a smart boy when I started schooling at five but became less and less studious. I remember I became especially bad in Mathematics. I could not follow what was teaching in the class. My mother used to come to my school during the lunch times to feed me and two elder brothers who went to the same school. One day, she found that I have not finished my Mathematics home works. She asked me to do during the lunch break but I did not know how to calculate. I knew the teacher was going to check our home work after lunch break and I was sure to get beaten because I had not done my homeworks.

I saw some other mothers were guiding their children how to do their home works so I asked my mother to help me. As a child I did not know the fact that my mother was illiterate and she could not help me. My poor mother asked a woman to help me but I said I did not want her help. My mother asked an exercise book from one of the students in the class so that I can see how he calculated. I was very unhappy. I felt like I was humiliated. I blamed my mother for not able to help with my school lessons just like other mothers. I was a bad boy. I could not think how my mother felt at that time.

Later, my mother told me that she could not help me because she did not go to school when she was young. The simple advice she could give me was to try harder to master the subject I scared. She told me not to give up Mathematics because I did not like it. I tried a bit harder. I continued struggling with Mathematics for three or four years more. But I got a Distinction in Mathematics when I passed my tenth standard. The boy who struggled terribly with Mathematics went to a Medical School, became a doctor and got a master degree in Public Health focusing in Epidemiology and Biostatics.

I owe my mother for every success in my life. Her simple advice is “ Don’t give up. Try harder for the things you scare to master it.”

I am miles away from her and could not be with her to celebrate her birthday. I could not even send her a nice birthday present. But I am sure my mother will forgive me as she did for all the wrong things I have done. She will be happy with my phone call. I pray for her to have a happy, healthy long life and God blesses her always. Happy Birthday May May.

Recall emails

I just learnt a few month ago that we can recall email when we use microsoft outlook. You just need to go to sent item. Then open the message we want to recall. Go to actions and click on recall. It is very useful.
Today, one of my colleagues was jumping because she clicked accidentally while preparing an important message. I was able to help her.
It is always good to learn new thing.

soemthing to keep in mind

What do we live for if not to make the world less difficult for each other. George Eliot

Take them as opportunities

Great opportunities to help others seldom come, but small ones surround us daily.
Sally Koch

Elephants

It is interesting to know how elephants make baby elephants. I learnt from the national geographic channel that the penis of the male elephant never insert into the vagina of female elephant. It just spray the semen around and the spermatozoa swim up with the assistance of vaginal muscle contraction. What a pity!

strength for the day

God doesn't require us to succeed; he only requires that you try. ( Mother Teresa )

Nude Beach

Nude Beach!! What a interesting concept for a Burmese guy like me. People go around without any clothes. When I was in Hawaii, people told me that there are some nude beaches on the island of Oaho or other islands. By the way, the State of Hawaii is made up of 8 islands and the capital " Honolulu is on the island called Oaho.

I wanted to go to nude beach but I know I am not comfortable to go around without clothes. So it took a while to gather my courage to go to nude beaches. Finally, I went to a nude beach in Big Island. The big island is another island and I had to flied there. My main purpose was to see volcano which is still active and producing lava. But my friends told me that there is a nude beach on the island and I can go without taking off my clothes. Then why not?

To my surprise, there are people around the beach selling drugs. There were group of people who were beating the drums. It is a way of relaxing their minds. Everyone can play the drum and the beat and rhythms change all the times. I also played the drum for a while. It was amazing.

But the most amazing thing was women without clothes..I also saw a family, father, mothers and children of age around 10 running at the beach without any clothes. What a strange culture..Anyway people are different.




Oh, I have to say that I also went to the volcano to fulfil my first in tension of going to the big island. It was not just nude beach.

Here you see, the car road was covered by the lava and you can also see lave flowing into the Pacific Ocean.

Safari in Maasai Mara

When I was ten years old, my mother made a very nice coat for me. She said it was called Safari Coat. I did not know what Safari means but I wore it happily. I came to know the definition of Safari later that it means a trip to see animals in the jungle in Africa and men wear safari coat when they go safari.

Later in my life, I got chance to go on safari without a safari coat. It was in March, 2008, I needed to go to Kenya for a meeting and I decided to go on safari for few days after the meeting.

I had to fly with a small flight for few hours from Nairobi to reach a small camp in Maasai Mara. The camp was on the river bank and the first thing I saw was a crocodile in the river. I also saw a group of hippopotamus in the river. Later on a group of elephants came to other side of the river to drink water. I also saw a small deer came to the river to drink water. I was worried for it because there was a crocodile in the river but the crocodile did not get chance to attack the deer.

Next morning, a jeep was waiting for me to go on the safari. There were other three people on the car too. I thought the jeep to go on a safari must be covered with glasses for the safety but I was surprised to see that it was open. I asked the guide what if the animals attack us. He said we were safe as long as we stayed on the car.

It was not a migration season so I did not see a lot of animals as we can see at the national geographic channel. But I still saw a lot of animals. The guide who drove the car explained the nature of different animals. I was amazed to learn about animals.

I saw lion, elephant, fox, zebra, deer, buffalo, hippo, monkey, giraffe, ostrich and many other animals. Another interesting thing I learn during the trip was lions are not always in the killing mood. They do not harm small animals if they are not hungry. And other small animals also know whether lions are in killing mood or not. If lions are not hungry, they just lay down and other animals will be going around near them. They are not like greedy people who are always trying to exploit each other. I think there are many things we can learn from animals.

Hero in my life

I was eight years old when I heard about him for the first time. His name is Father Damien. He was born on 3 January, 1840 in Belgium and died on 15 April, 1889 in Molokai.

At that time, there was no treatment for leprosy. People with that nasty disease were forced to leave their homes and families and had to stay out of the cities. There is a beautiful island in the Pacific called Moloki. It was a place for people with leprosy. People who got the disease were sent to the island where they did not have any support. They had to live just like animals till they died.

Father Damien volunteered to take care those people in tha little island. He gave them homes, provide moral support and medical care. Finally he got the disease and passed away on the island.

I got chance to study in Hawaii for six months. I determined to go to Moloki to find the footsteps of Father Damien. Above is the photo of the Molokai beach where people with Leprosy were kicked and pushed into the water from the ships that carried them from their home to that isolated island.

My Father

Life is interesting. You cannot be lucky in every aspect. You are winning in some battles but loosing in others. I have been lucky in many occasions but sometimes the luck frowned on me. Many of the happy moments and many of the sad moments fade out as time passes slowly but I have unforgettable stories in my life just like every person. It is a sad one.

I was in Hawaii at that time. You can say it is one of the most beautiful places on the world. The program I was participating was not very stressful. Most of the time, we were having fun, exchanging cultures and learning lightly on leadership and other core issues. Six months passed very quickly and it was time for some friends to go home because the program has two options: to leave after six months or to leave after nine months. I felt sorry to see friends leave Hale Manoa but the hardest hit came suddenly one day when I checked my email.

It was from my sister and she said my father got liver cancer. I saw people laughing in front of the computer screen so many times because they got very good news, hilarious jokes or funny pictures from friends and relatives. To me it was a shock to see the short message. I repeated again and again hoping despearately that message change or I found my self in the bed and realize it was just a bad dream. But it was real.

To make the story short, I went back home quickly in February to take care my father. Good thing was he was not suffering a lot when I arrived back. I have seen a lot of people with liver cancer. They got diagnose and died within few weeks. But my father had a special case. It was not very aggressive and all he felt at that time was some discomfort and loss of appetite.

Then in April, I got messages from both the University of Hawaii and Johns Hopkins that they decided to provide me scholarship to do my MPH. What a bad timing. I have been trying to get a scholarship for a long time and the luck never smiled on me before. At that time, I had two offers.

My father encouraged me to go. I also really wanted to go because it was a very rare chance for me. He was also not suffering so I thought it should not be a problem to go there for a year. Selfishness got better of me and I made the decision to go. I did not tell my father that he got liver cancer because it is tradition in our country not to tell people that they have terminally ill diseases. We just told him that there was something wrong with his liver and he would be fine. It was so difficult for me to tell a lie whenever my father asked me about his health condition.

I arrived to Baltimore in July, 2003 and the first thing I felt in USA was guilt. I am a doctor but I was away when my father needed me most. I called my father every week. He was fine at first but got weaker and weaker. He always said he was fine and to study hard every time I called him. But I knew he was not fine. His voice got very weaker and weaker, he got pain that prevented him from sleeping at night. I promised him to come back and see him during Christmas holiday.

Christmas came, I went back home. I had to stop at Bangkok for the whole night because there is not flight flying in Burma from Bangkok at night. I was thinking about my father. I could not wait to see him. I hoped he would like my presents that I carefully bought from USA. I imagined he would be very happy to see me although his condition was bad at that time. I hoped I could apologize him for my selfishness. I imagined he would be smiling as he listen my experiences in USA and it would at least help him to forget his suffering for a while. I was dreaming about happy Christmas times we had when we were young because it was Christmas Eve. It was one of the longest nights in my life.

I arrived back home on Christmas day. When I stepped in my house, I saw my mother cooking in the kitchen. She did not hug me or even greet me. She was just kept on cooking. Things were strange. Then my sister told me that, my father did not wake up that morning and he got coma. I thought I was being cursed. I rushed into my father’s room. He was on the bed and was not able to answer me or look at me. My mother cired and told me that he was waiting me last night and did not go back till they went to church for midnight mass.

I called my best friends. All advised me to hospitalize him. I got chance to take care of him for the last five days in his life and he passed away on 30th December. His funeral was on the New Year day. For me, Christmas and New Year are never same as before since my father’s death. He got his consciousness at one point at the hospital but I was not sure he knew that I was beside him or not. I was also not sure that he had forgiven his selfish son or not....

most important thing in life

People said they are fighting for peace. But I see hatred in their eyes..
They said they want justice. But I find them discriminate helpless people...

I try to understand them because for me to understand is more important than to be understood.. to give is more important than to get and to love is more important than to be loved...

However, it is very difficult to understand people. I think the most interesting in the world is human nature.